Sunday, September 11, 2011

Swift Kicks & Broken Promises

First topic -- Princess' soccer games started yesterday with a Jamboree. These are half-games (two 15m halves with 5m halftime); with stops & starts, they last about 40-45 minutes. Ours were at a middle school, about half an hour away from home. We were up at 6am (ugh), got dressed, packed some food & lots of water, I made a mocha, & we were off. I stopped at Dutch Bros to get her a small mocha (didn't think to make her one at home).

We got to the school just at 730a. Coach asks that the girls try to be on the fields for warm-ups half hour before game time. Since game time was 8am, that was perfect timing. Princess was even chilly (at 730a, it was only 62`)... but not for long! First game, they won 2-0. We had about an hour & a half before the next game, so we scooted our game chairs back to allow other parents to watch their games, and had a small snack.

It was starting to warm-up so off came the sweatshirts and on went the sunscreen. Second game was lost 0-1, but it was a lucky "hail-mary" type shot at the end of the game. By this point, the girls were hot & hungry, so I set out a blanket & opened up the cooler. We had a lunch of sandwiches, Sun Chips (mmmmm, French Onion), & cherries. I had brought a magazine, cards, and a word search book to keep us entertained, but never took any of it out; soccer moms are entertaining enough sometimes!

At this point, it's 1130a, and we knew the games were starting to run over (our last one was scheduled for 1150a, but the one before ours had *just* started), so again, we sunscreened ourselves & our girls, I made sure Princess had enough water, and I got my umbrella out for leg protection (I already have an umbrella chair), & situated my blanket over my chair to cover more of the sides & back. CP (KP's mom) made fun of my "cocoon" but my French-mix skin is not made for all that sun!

The last game started at 1205p... *only* 15 minutes late. That one was also won 2-0. The girls were hot, dirty, and completely exhausted by the end. Snack & drinks were provided by two of the families (once again, I am in charge of coordinating this, as I've done almost every season since Princess started playing) -- mini Oreos & Gatorade. We loaded up the car, and when we got home, she took a much-needed shower. At 6p, I dropped her off at the MAX (my mom met us there; she's not old enough to ride alone yet); she slept long & well last night.

Second topic -- Does anyone know why someone would make a promise, then break said promise? Not once, not twice, not ten times... try many hundreds, over the last 10 or so years. Princess' biological father is one of those people, and it drives us both crazy. Well, correction; it USED to drive us both crazy. Now, it's just par for the course. No matter what he says (to her on the phone, or to me, through his wife, via email), we both have this, "Yeah, whatever... I'll believe it when I see it" attitude. Specifically, when he says he'll come to something.

Let me backtrack. The last phone call he made to her was early May (yes, five months ago). She & Ace were home (I was at work), so when I got home & saw a message from him, I asked why she didn't answer the phone. She said, "I don't want to talk to him. I have nothing to say." Ok, then. At this point, she *had* actually spoken to him over the phone about a month prior, so I figured no big deal. Then the months went by...

I sent him an email in early August with the soccer practice schedule; no response. I then sent him an updated schedule in mid-August, and got "Thanks for the info, we are busy this Thursday but we'll come next Monday for sure, M****** is also playing soccer and is eager to watch her sister play. Do you have her game schedule yet?" I replied, "She will not be there the next two Mondays (22nd & 29th), nor the Thursday in between (25th). Game schedule is always posted around Labor Day weekend."

Of course, I know full well it's always Princess' SM, *NOT* her father, answering the emails, which is sad for them... After all these years, she still doesn't "allow" him to communicate with me without her interference. Trust issues, much? Anyway, her response back to me was, "I did not receive the required notification that she would be going away." -- um, maybe because I'm not required to give you anything when she travels with ME? Regardless, I just ignored (my attorney got a copy of all of these, btw).

First day of school, I sent a (very small) version of Princess' first day of school pic. I got, "Thank you. Who is her teacher this year?" which I also ignored. I figure if HER "FATHER" really cared, he'd call & actually ask her. Apparently, he *did* call her that night. They spoke for about 10 minutes. I think that's the longest phone convo they've ever had. During that conversation, he asked all sorts of information, including her soccer game schedule ("I'm sure it's online," was her answer). He then told her he was going to *try* to "stop by" her game.

I'm going to take a stab in the dark, here, and assume he hadn't seen the schedule yet, because (as I've already said) she had three games, not one, and (like I said) they were 1/2 hour from my house; he lives even further away from that town than I do. Friday night, he called again. This time, she recognized his number and didn't want to answer the phone this time. I told her that it is her decision what kind of contact she allows him to have, so she let it go to voicemail. He left a message, making sure she would be at "tomorrow's game"...

Saturday came... no BD for the first game... maybe 8am is too early; fine. Second game... still no bio... Just before the third game started, Princess goes, "Good thing I wasn't holding my breath, huh, mom?" and off she went. Yes, baby; good thing. I hate that he does this to her, though. I don't understand why he makes promises he doesn't keep. All I ask is that he makes a commitment and sticks to it; make a promise & stick to it (I know, I know... he has the worst history with this).

She doesn't really care if he's there or not; in fact, she'd rather he DIDN'T come to things. But if he tells her he's going to do something, follow through! Truthfully, though, things are going to change around here regarding these things... He never did ask her who her teacher is.

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