Thursday, October 27, 2011

Still Not Healed, & Pissed Off

This is officially my 100th post in this blog... I wanted to make it an important one, so I chose to blog about my daughter's abduction, once again. It's been four years since her biological father & stepmother took her from our home (I call it "kidnapping", the legal definition is "parental abduction"). Even with counseling, she's still not whole... and neither am I. Whole-ness will not come until trust is restored.

Since last year, I can easily count how many events of hers he's attended. Final count for last year's Fall soccer -- 2 games. Basketball season -- nothing. Spring soccer - nothing. School events, 5th grade -- 2 (a conference and a band concert). Fall soccer so far this year -- 2 games. School events, 6th grade -- 1 (a conference; she hasn't had anything else, yet, though). He's called, on average, about once a month. He didn't call at all last summer.

Not that she wants to talk to him on the phone, anyway... When he does call, if we're even home, she lets it go to voicemail & doesn't call him back. No, I don't make her. She's old enough now to make that decision for herself; she'll be 12yo soon. She's not, however, completely ready to tell him to his face how she feels, but has started a letter to him. No idea if that'll help the situation, but it will help her by allowing her to get her feelings out.

One thing I've been thinking about doing, too, is allowing him to email her. On the plus side - it would allow her to determine when she "talks" to him and what she shares. On the down side - it is impossible to guarantee that it is only him that she's "talking" to. Her stepmother has a horrible habit of using bd's email to communicate with me; what's to stop her from doing it with Princess? Nothing. Still thinking about this idea...

He hasn't made even one attempt to try to pay me back any of the money he owes me -- remember, it's six attorney's fees judgments (averaging $4000 each), plus accruing child support. The support, alone, is currently just under $8500. In the past year, I've gotten a grand total of $193 -- none of them paid willingly. Not sure what he thinks that's supposed to cover... Both he & his wife have also told his mother that he's paying me $100/month, like he's supposed to. Wonder what she'd say/think if I sent her a copy of the child support printout?

And now, probably for no other reason except that his wife is making him (guess her own three kids & whatever she does during the day doesn't keep her busy enough; she has to piss on my parade, too), he's started some crap about not being able to volunteer at Princess' school. Really? After all these years... that's his angle?

Well, guess what? She doesn't want him to!! But, before pitching a fit at the school district, did he even bother to ask HER how she felt about it? No. Once again, to them, it's not about doing what's best for Princess; it's about what THEY want and what is in THEIR best interests. Time & time again, they've proven that they only care about two things -- (1) getting under my skin, and (2) getting what they want, regardless of who it hurts.

It was their own selfishness that got him into this situation... and it will be complete selfLESSness that will get him out. All the crap his wife likes to say against me -- claiming Parental Alienation Syndrome, etc -- is just her pathetic attempt to make herself & him look like the innocent victims. PRINCESS is the only innocent victim, here.

So, I look forward to whatever the outcome of this latest stunt is... but they should consider themselves warned: I will protect my daughter from anything, and anyONE, out to harm her.

1 comment:

  1. J emails his biomom now. It was frequent at first, and now he's feeling the disappointment when he doesn't get responses from her.

    It's hard when you want to protect them from being hurt, but covering for the other parent doesn't help them.