SNOWPOCALYPSE!

HAHA! Decided to take some time during the snow storm we've been having to update you all (well, those of you who I haven't already personally updated, or who want more details than I post on FB).

KIDS:
1. After taking a year off due to his mother's complete & total disregard for his educational future, Gamerboy has gotten the ball rolling again on FAFSA, and other financial aid options. He got some notices, but is waiting for confirmation of a couple more. He still plans on attending Portland State in the fall (he will be in his third year). He & one of the guys from his house-room for rent situation moved into an apartment of their own a couple months ago, and he loves that it's close to his newer job, and a little less driving time to come visit us (or vice versa). We're waiting for a job update from him regarding permanent status (he was a full time, but temp, employee over the holidays, but is still there... so hopeful!).
2. Squeeks' job at the restaurant drastically cut her hours, and her mother has taken a hiatus from dog training (where Squeeks was assisting), so she's in the process of finding a new one... not a whole lot to choose from up on the mountain, but she does have a car (well, truck; our old truck, actually). Cover letters, applications, interviews -- OH MY! She's also now in her second term at MHCC, taking a full load of classes. She continues her long-distance relationship (although we like him a lot, I'm not sure about longevity of this relationship, mostly due to his plan to join the military, but we'll see). She's also been learning how to maneuver in the adult world, like taking care of her own doctor's appts. She's made a couple of mistakes, but hey... don't we all? I really hope her mother doesn't screw her over (home/living situation & financially, mostly) like she did with Gamerboy, but only time will tell with that one.
3. Princess is now in the second half of 8th grade. Her grades continue to be excellent (Honor Roll every term of middle school so far), even though her major complaint is her math teacher's lack of kindness in her teaching. She also, unlike every other teacher Princess has (with the exception of her PE teacher, of course), doesn't allow them to listen to music while doing their work. For a child who lives in a home with constant music of some sort (her Papa plays guitar & bass, and we always have music going somewhere in the house), this is actually a distraction. She finds herself unable to fully concentrate, and her grades suffer (not much; it's the only class she has a B in). Such is life, and she just does what's needed until she can move on in a few months. She also has decided that, among her other classes (forecasting will be done this month), she will take Spanish next year (she was going to do French, but decided Spanish made more sense for her future), and will not continue in cheerleading. I reminded her that she needs to do *something* to keep active, so she's taken to doing at-home exercises & yoga in her room at night. She also uses the equipment at school during "free time" in PE. She & I are considering taking a yoga class together, maybe in the Fall...?

US:
1. My occupational therapy is almost done. I have one more "check in" appt to see where I'm at, then I'll probably make one with my regular doc. At that point, we'll probably be ready to discuss settlement.
2. Ace, too, is almost done with his physical therapy; just a few more weeks to go. He's been going twice a week, and although it hurts him quite a bit, he seems better each time. He's never going to run for enjoyment anymore, or ski, or other active things he used to do, and only time will tell how the metal plate & pins will affect his life in other ways, but he's healing... and that's important.
3. My work hasn't slowed down much. Usually, there's a lull January to March, but I haven't seen that yet (with the exception of one week in mid-January). Most of my clients have scheduled through early June, and would book out through summer if I'd let them. We're working on our family's summer plans (possibly another camping trip, a beach trip or two, and whatever Princess is doing, plus my 40th birthday).
4. We were bummed that Ace couldn't come with us to my baby sister's wedding, but it was BEAUTIFUL... and (I can' remember if I've said anything about this) we found out in November that they are expecting (a boy - we found that out later) in late April!
5. We're starting on plans for the landscaping and *hoping* to get at least a start on it come spring. So far, our plan consists of: quite a bit of tree-hacking, a firepit/seating area in the back yard, new gates on both sides of the house, and extending/building our deck (which is currently a concrete slab, since we tore out the old deck that was not safe). We'd also like to repave/widen our parking pad, and do a walk path of some sort from the driveway to the front door.

LEGAL/EX-stuff:
1. Ace is in the process of redoing his C.S. obligation, since Gamerboy has aged out (he turned 21y a couple months ago). Since we went the "DA's office" route, this could take a couple months...
2. The Wildebeest (since we all know she continues to act & speak for the S.D.) continues to bitch every time I have to make contact. The latest round was about Princess' eye appts. She had three. The first time, I emailed a scan of our HSA card's receipt and the breakdown of costs to them. That amount (a "whopping" $33.50) was paid three days late, and I had to send a friendly reminder about it. The second time, I emailed a scan of our HSA card's receipt, only, since that's all I got. She literally went back & forth with me about it (this bill was only $15, and is due TODAY), not only claiming that the "credit card" receipt with Ace's name on it (the same type as the first round, btw) could be mine or Ace's bills (yeah, 'cuz we're so hard up for money, we try to pass off $15 as Princess'...), but then went off-subject saying that the child support is "always paid" (um, the c.s. website says differently -- you're now over $7000 in arrears), and, my favorite topic, "...as you continue to keep me from even talking to M******* as I am legally allowed, it further supports the Parental Alienation syndrome you have subjected her to..." Really? WTF is WRONG with them?!?! Oh, just for the record, the third appt was considered part of the "fitting fee", since it was just a check to make sure her new prescription was working well, and therefore there were no additional fees.
3. While Princess *did* get birthday presents (two WEEKS late), she has not gotten Santamas gifts. Seeing as it's February, she's most likely not getting any. And, you know what? She said that was fine. She doesn't really want them, anyway... but the insistence that *I* am keeping her from them, when in reality she wants nothing to do with them, is almost comical.
4. After the latest round of bitchiness from Maleficent to Ace, I decided it was time to block her. I already had her email address blocked, but figured it was time to block her on FB too. She went from condescendingly-civil to downright nasty after Squeeks turned 18y... since I don't HAVE to deal with her, I am done. I also deleted her from my address book & cell phone.
5. I also made a call a few weeks ago to my C.S. case worker. I got tired of waiting for them to do something about M's arrears. He basically said the same thing he's said before, "You can't get blood from a turnip." Since M works under the table, and claims he's "just a stay at home dad" (bullshit), he has nothing to legally garnish. Since J gets a paycheck & pays taxes, but isn't legally liable to pay M's C.S., they can't garnish anything. Any tax refund they get is held for "up to six months" for the C.S. dept to figure out how much, if any, is M's... I would, of course, get that. But, the last few years, none of it was. The only payments I got was a few $100 or less payments almost three years ago, when he was trying to avoid having his license suspended. So, I asked my worker to look into that again (meanwhile, what I assume is a Fed refund, garnished mid-July, 2013, is sitting in C.S.'s coffers). A few days later, I get a copy of "Intent to Suspend License"... and wouldn't you know it, a deposit of all but just over $300 of that assumed Fed refund is deposited into my bank account just a couple days later. Fine with me, except he's still (as I said before) over $7000 in arrears (not to mention the close to $30,000 in unpaid attorney's fees judgements). Now, I have a few things up my sleeve, but I'm not ready to share those with you here (since we all know Wildebeest reads these blogs). As things progress, I'll post updates.

JUST FOR FUN --
Enjoy these few pics of my furry babies & yard; currently at 9" & counting!

Minions!

(A) Princess' birthday celebration was done in three parts --
First, *on* her birthday, she wore a crown all day (she called it her "Princess Crown"). Her friends decorated her locker (inside & out!). I took her to lunch at DQ (yes, I pulled her out of school). We also took her to Mongolian Grill for dinner (but no singing; she HATES that!).
Then, on Saturday, I treated her to a massage (by Hallie, the massage therapist at my salon), and a gel polish pedicure (done by me, of course). She didn't want sushi, as we had planned, so I gave her money to go get a Subway sandwich while I cleaned up my studio. We picked up KC on our way home, KP walked over soon after, and KH got dropped off about an hour later. My friend, Jessica (who runs a small cake-making business), dropped off the Minion-themed cake I asked for; the girls absolutely LOVED it! There were gifts, pizza, and a lot of giggling! All but KH spent the night.
Last, on Friday of the following week (rescheduled from Friday, Nov 8th, due to Princess' migraine), she had dinner with her Mimi at Red Robin, along with a few gifts.

(B) Our water-logged floors have been completely redone; they look beautiful! Charter Construction did a WONDERFUL job; all their subs/guys are super detail-oriented. These were the first contractors who did things like we wanted without us feeling we had to babysit them. While they were here, we also had them install a new house-to-garage door, and fix the front door's install (on our dime, of course). We liked their work so much, we'll also be having them install our new back door soon, too.

(C) Two *WEEKS* after her birthday (I was taking bets... We were all way off.), the Wildebeest dropped gifts off for her at our house.
.1. Why does SHE do this? This is one of many things that piss us all off; HE is perfectly capable of doing this himself. They live 10m or less from us! OR, maybe they can respect Princess's wishes to STAY THE EFF AWAY FROM HER & HER HOUSE (yes, this applies to the Wildebeest, too!), and (if you insist on giving her stuff) do it on time, and send them in the mail?!?!
.2. When she dropped them off, she didn't ring the bell nor knock; just dropped them on the porch & left. To me (& Princess, when we told her), that is sneaky. We can only assume that Wildebeest was trying to catch a glimpse of her coming home from the bus, as she did last year (scared the crap out of her last year, btw; she ran home shaking after Wildebeest honked at her!).
.3. Wildebeest also included a card (sappy - which Princess hates), in which she wrote something about "missing" Princess and "looking forward to the day" she "comes home" to them (HAHAHAHA!! Never going to happen, Wildebeest), and pics of two of the three girls; LL's senior pic (she graduated last June), & little MG's 2nd grade pic. None of the littlest, LG... to be sent "later"; no idea why. However, I *do* know that Princess doesn't want these things. To her, it's a slap in the face. She literally rolled her eyes, tore up the pics, and threw them & the card in the recycling bin!
If you want to look for *good* news out of all of this: the sweater (it was on her wishlist) was only one size too big, and the phone case & lanyard were also on her wishlist (although the case was a crappy, China-made, ill-fitting one). She also got some Minion-themed Duck tape (although cute, she doesn't Duck tape much anymore).

I know I've been saying this stuff for years (did you guys know it's been SIX YEARS since MG & the Wildebeest kidnapped Princess?!?!), but apparently, they have a hard time hearing the words from me. I will tell you one new thing... Princess has said that if her bio ever tried to take me back to court, she'd testify loud & clear how she really feels about them & this whole situation... then, maybe they'll finally get it, and leave her (& me) alone. But, we're not holding our breaths. Four more years, and counting!

Stupid Stereotypes...

An email went out to all parents at Princess' school from the principal on Wednesday, October 30th. It read:
"1. Yes, Halloween is here tomorrow, wow! I think I’ve sent this before, but just to remind you, costumes are ok, but school dress code still applies. In addition, please be sure costume themes are school appropriate. In past years we have had some students come as “pimps” or “gangsters” or cross-dressing, specifically male to female. Sometimes students want to be really gory and bloody, and that is also not appropriate. Any sort of weapon is of course unacceptable, although carrying accessories such as a wand, or a hat or something is fine. Students have had advisory lessons covering this information. 2. On the theme of school dress code, I am seeing some young women showing a little more than perhaps parents realize when they leave the house. Tomorrow during advisory I will be having all female students come to the commons so I can share the following information:

a. Shorts need to be at least finger length. Athletic shorts are fine, but they must be appropriate.
b. All undergarments must be covered up. In addition, no spaghetti straps or strapless are allowed. Tank tops must have a noticeable width – two fingers is a good guide.
c. All tops must adequately cover your chest. If you are pulling up your shirt all day, you need to put something on over it.
d. Leggings must have something over them – shorts, skirts, long blouse, dress, etc. After today, they will no longer be allowed worn without something else over them.
e. Headbands are fine – bandanas are not.
f. Midriffs must be covered at all times.

If students are not dressed appropriately, they will be escorted to the office and we will phone a parent to bring other clothing. Thank you in advance for your support!"

Then, another email Thursday afternoon, Oct 31st. It read:
"Good afternoon,
I want to just clarify what was said at the assembly today as there have already been some questions. This morning I called all the girls into the commons to talk about dress code, as I had emailed you yesterday. There were multiple other female staff members present, but no men. I began by telling the girls we were there to discuss appropriate clothing for school as we were all there to learn, and I did make a comment that at times the way girls dress can distract the boys and keep them from learning. Giggle, giggle, giggle as you can imagine, but it got their attention. I then went into specifics about short shorts, low tops, spaghetti straps etc. The final topic was leggings, which I have to say was not received well. There were multiple questions and we had some students come up to show what was appropriate and inappropriate. Many girls were not happy about this, and apparently there is a group of students planning to wear leggings tomorrow just to see what we will do. Please know that we will call you if your student has only leggings with no other covering over them. To my memory, that was the only comment about boys in the assembly and I did it just to get their attention. There was no specific connection to boys and any particular area of dress. Thank you again for your support. I welcome your questions."

I read these, and thought, "I have to say something..." but first, I wanted to get Princess' take on the whole thing. She said that some of her classmates felt embarrassed, and a LOT of girls were pissed about the leggings & bandana parts. We talked for a little bit about how she felt & her interpretation of what was said. Then, I posted these letters for my "Close Friends" on FB, and asked their opinions. Then, I thought about it all weekend. Yesterday morning, I sent this:
"I have a bit of a problem with the way this way handled... (1) In this day & age, we should be teaching our girls (and I *do* teach mine) to respect their own bodies enough to wear appropriate clothing. It is not, EVER, a girls' responsibility to curtail boys' behaviors &/or thoughts. No matter how you brought it up (even in passing), boys should NOT have been brought up in the clothing discussion. I feel very strongly about this, and every time I see something like it, I feel the need to speak up. Why are we still teaching the girls that they need to watch what they wear/say/act because of boys' reactions?!?! This is 2013, and boys need to be fully responsible for their own actions & thoughts; hopefully being taught such by their families. I hope in the future, you will refrain from perpetuating this stupid stereotype. (2) If you have a rule about certain clothing items, it should apply across the board -- every item, both genders. For instance, it was brought to my attention that, while you said specifically that they couldn't wear bandanas, I know of many girls who wear them as headbands. One friend of my daughter wore one & was told to remove it. Another friend of hers wore one & was not. This happened in the SAME class, with the SAME teacher. It just so happened one headband was black & the other was DUCKS-themed. I can sort of understand ruling out "gang" colors, but, in my opinion, that would be inappropriate, as well, considering the two main colors -- red & blue -- are also {the local high school}'s colors. If you want to ban bandanas, then NO STUDENT, for ANY REASON, should be able to wear them. (3) My daughter also said that some of the girls that were called up as examples were embarrassed; for a 12 or 13yo girl to be made an example of in front of her peers is totally inappropriate. If you want to provide examples, use drawings, or pictures from the internet, or maybe ASK a few students ahead of time if they mind being called out (good or bad).

I also wanted to share some of my mom-friends' (some of whom have children at SM) opinions with you --
A. "What happened to class and to have dignity and respect for ones self and that we don't need to flaunt in order to receive self worth or respect from anyone...?"
B. "Ostracizing them in front of their class mates as examples?!? That is humiliating and singles them out as the "slutty ones." At that age, their self-esteem is so fragile."
C. "That's like telling a girl that she was raped because of her outfit! Not only teach your girls to dress with respect, but teach your boys how to respect girls/women, no matter what they are wearing! This pisses me off!!"
D. "It is maddening how the "boys will be boys" attitude is still perpetuated. Like men are too stupid to be in control of their actions, so women have to constantly consider and modify their own behavior. It's actually very insulting to men."

I want to reiterate that I *do* agree with more modest (to some degree) clothing (cover your butt, crotch, boobs & midriff), but I don't see a problem with leggings worn as pants (as long as you can't see their underwear), bandanas worn as headbands (or "support" bands on their arms), or tank/cami tops worn with a shirt over them (I don't see a problem with exposed shoulders, either, btw).

Thank you for caring enough about our girls to try to curb some of the inappropriate dress, and feel free to contact me any time."

I actually was going to also mention that I disagreed with the "cross-dressing" part, but forgot about it when I went to send the letter. Saying cross-dressing, "specifically male to female", is inappropriate is sexist. It says to me, at least, that a girl wanting to dress as a boy is fine, but a boy wanting to dress as a girl is not acceptable. It's not like the kids are wearing fishnets & rubber bras! Princess said that one of her male friends dressed as a grandma last year, and got in trouble! This year, Princess & her friends dressed as Batman, Robin, & The Joker... and none of them got in trouble! What message is this sending to our kids??!?!

Her response was within the hour:
"Good morning,

Thank you so much for taking the time to email me with your support as well as your concerns. I completely agree that young women should be taught to respect their bodies enough to wear appropriate clothing. The only time I made mention of boys was at the very beginning and it was simply to get their attention. I apologize if this was offensive. As for calling students up for examples, the only students that came up were completely voluntary, I did not call anyone out or force anyone to show what they were wearing. Also, no student was put down or made fun of that volunteered to show an example, either appropriate or inappropriate. I appreciated their willingness to volunteer and felt I was respectful of their feelings.

As for bandanas, they are not allowed to be worn by any student. Many of the girls wear headbands, but bandanas of any color are not allowed. I will talk to my staff to be sure this is clarified for them.

Again, I do appreciate the communication. If you ever want to talk in person, or if your daughter has a concern she would like to share, I am always open."

I feel this was a total blow-off letter; she doesn't really care about my opinion & is going to do things her way, no matter what other parents say. Another school-parent/friend of mine is going to write to her, too, but I really feel Ms S will blow her off, as well. I suppose I can take consolation in two things -- (1) Princess isn't one to break school rules (as much as she will complain & disagree with it), and (2) She's only got seven more months of dealing with these rules before she goes to H.S., where these rules don't exist, anyway.

Another Update

Cheer/Football -- My meeting with Brian went wonderfully. I really felt he listened to what I had to say. I know he took my suggestions to heart because he & his wife discussed some of them, and he & I talked about five specific suggestions I made. Among the ones he liked & agreed with: (1) A "Team Meeting" early in the season. He also said he was contemplating having one at the end of the season, to get some feedback from parents & cheerleaders/football players as to what's working, what's not, and suggestions from team members & parents for upcoming years. (2) More streamlined uniform fittings, with two lines; one for cheer & one for football... also, maybe a mid-week/evening time frame instead of just a Saturday morning. (3) More & better notification for upcoming events, appts, meetings, & schedule changes. (4) Having a team parent for the cheerleaders (each team) so that the coaches (which are high school girls) can focus on teaching the girls, plus their own schoolwork & cheer practices; leaving each team with an actual adult to go to for any reason (like the football players have). (5) Asking the younger players' parents (like the 3/4's) to be part of the volunteer staff; get them in early means a higher chance of things working more smoothly, as those parents are more likely to be in that position for a few years, then they can train & hand off the position to another young player's parent when their kid ages out of the Youth program. I told Brian that this will better insure continuity in the program. Although I can't fix the program to run better, I feel talking to Brian about my specific concerns (& the fact that I wasn't the only one with them) was the right thing to do. My hope is that if Princess makes the squad, and decides to coach-assist next year (as a Freshman, she can't be an actual coach), the program is run better & is more organized.

Household -- Our flooring is just about done being installed. We had to stop last week so we could have Charter install our new garage-to-house door, reinstall our front door, & fix some water damage there (on our dime, of course; these aren't part of the home owner's claim). The crew will finish installing the floors today, and next week, the trim will be installed & all the "stuff" will be put back where it goes.

Medical -- Ace is *supposed* to return to work full-bore on Thursday. The problem is that he's still in pain, can't easily do stairs, and by the end of a day at home, his leg is uncomfortably swollen. He has a call in to the doc about it, plus wants to do some physical therapy. I started occupational therapy a week and a half ago; I have two 3X-daily therapies to do. These are not easy, and cause me some discomfort, so I will assume it's working. I go back for my second appointment on Thursday.

Work -- I am busy. I checked the numbers yesterday... I'm currently averaging $300/m more (gross) this year than last. My books are 80% - 90% full; I'm working, on average, 35hrs/week. I feel a bit overwhelmed, though, because this increase seemed to come in a jump soon after our accident. So, not only am I working away from home more, but I also took on the majority of the housework & all of Princess' taxi duty. When you're used to a spouse who actually does half of the home/parent responsibilities, then you have to do it all for a while, the stress kind of gets to you. We're at the tail end now, though...

Legal -- (A) Our case is moving along slowly, but surely. Doug estimates I'll have a settlement offer within 6m, and Ace will have one before 1yr. We're hoping sooner rather than later, but the biggest concern is long-term physical & emotional damage. But, everything so far looks good. (B) I have to laugh... I got this email from Wildebeest, signed with S.D.'s name of course, when Princess & I were en route to my sister's wedding last weekend: "D*** - It has been brought to my attention that M******* is traveling out of state. As is required by law you are to supply me with a complete travel itinerary as well as contact information for her while she is traveling. This is just one of many blatant court order violations, continually not allowing me to talk to her, repeatedly failing to inform me of her activities, repeated failures to provide travel info. Please provide me this information immediately or there will be consequences.- M***" My response was simply, "I thought I sent it, but I may be mistaken. I do apologize. She & I are headed to Rapid City & will return Sunday afternoon." Let's address the points, one by one, shall we? First, I simply forgot. It's so few & far between that anything happens that I am required to share with him that occasionally, something gets forgotten. Second, it is not "required by law"; technically, it is "required by court order". Third, as anyone with half a brain could tell you, Princess wants nothing to do with her S.D. That's why 2+ years ago, she told him to (basically) leave her alone. Since then, he hasn't made ONE ATTEMPT to call, see, or contact her (which is actually how she prefers it)... unless you count the two birthdays & two Santamases since, when the Wildebeest dropped off gifts for her (last Santamas, we actually got them at the end of January). Fourth, I inform him of her activities as required by our court order. I can't be held accountable for his inability to look for or find specific information that everyone else with that same info can find. Fifth, there is really no need to provide detailed travel info anymore... but I've never intentionally & maliciously withheld it. Sixth, I'd LOVE to know what these "serious consequences" are... Pretty sure his repeated failures to pay child support & the six attorney fee judgments to me would go over a lot worse than the minor, unintentional, infractions I've done. And, last, after all these years, why does Wildebeest still do S.D.'s correspondence? I don't know about you, but in my relationship, I completely trust my husband to communicate anything he wants to with his ex-wife. It's pathetic, really, that Wildebeest still doesn't trust S.D.

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

A couple weeks ago, Princess heard a dripping noise coming from the hall. Seemed our a/c unit was leaking... onto our laminate flooring. Ace called ServPro, who promptly sent a project manager out to take a look & assess the damage. He told us to call our home owner's company and file a claim, then call him back when we had a claim number. We also called Columbia, who we have a service agreement through, to get out here asap & fix the leak. ServPro had their guys back out here within an hour to start pulling up our flooring, and drying out the problem areas. Columbia tried telling us that because the a/c still "technically worked" (you know, as it's pouring water all over our floor), it's not an "emergency" and therefore, they couldn't get someone out here for three more days. I said, "No. You'll be out here tomorrow before noon, or I'm pulling my contract, and filing a lawsuit." At this point, it was over 90` outside, and when we shut off the a/c for 10m, got up to 86` in my house. Ace was, obviously, still stuck in the house; no way was I going to make him suffer for three days. Anyway, I think they knew I was pissed, and serious about my threat; they were out here by 1030a the next morning.

Everything was fixed, and dried out, so the next step was a contractor. My insurance company gave me three companies I could call, but of course, I can call my own guy, if I wanted. Ace did a little research, found some reviews on some different places, and called one from the insurance company's list. He was out here Thursday of last week, took a look around, and told Ace he'd have a bid to us "early next week". Looks like, because of how it was laid (& for batch match), our entire main living areas' sub-floor, flooring, baseboards, & quarter-round will all be replaced, along with some of the trim for a couple of doors. Luckily, the flooring company still makes the same stuff (since we obviously love it), but if they didn't, our policy would cover replacement of ALL our floors (bedrooms, too, because they match).

Last week, Monday (the 16th), Ace had another follow-up. At this appt, he had another set of X-rays and put a little weight on his right foot, just to see how well he's healing. Dr D said everything looks great. He then had him do some up & down, side to side, and bend his toes. He can stretch up & down just fine, his side to side is about 1/2 of what it should be, and he can't fully bend his toes. So, his instructions are as follows -- put 1/3 weight on his foot; gently & still using crutch-assistance (for at least the next 10 days). After those 10 days (which puts us at this Thursday), he's to use one crutch, and try for 2/3 weight. We go back four weeks from today for another check, but if he continues with his progressive (& aggressive) at-home PT, as instructed, he will be released back to work Oct 24th.

Last week, Wednesday (the 18th), we finally met with our attorneys. We definitely have a good case. Since the driver of the other car (a rental, no less) is not an American citizen, we're unsure how (if at all) this will affect our claims, but we're pretty confident that within a year, we'll have a settlement. Ace & I have some "homework" to do over the next couple weeks -- keep a journal of all the ways this accident has affected our lives. They want missed events, day to day changes, etc. We also need to gather our financial info for the last few years (so they can get a good idea of his loss of income), send copies of all the pics we've taken related to the accident, and copies of all medical & motorcycle repair bills. I didn't know not to throw out the ruined gear, but I did get pics before I did so, so those will get sent out, too.

Last thing for now -- my meeting with Brian will happen tonight. I honestly don't think it'll do any good, and things probably won't change, but I have to try...